Calling all my introverts, highly sensitive peeps, and empaths! The past month has been energetically taxing for myself, which has prompted me to put this guide together to help us maintain sanity and stay centered.
The rise of social media has been a blessing, allowing us to keep in touch with loved ones regardless the physical distance. But getting real, good things should be consumed in moderation. We need to keep in mind how our hyper-connection with the rest of the world is weighing us down.
Alone time is key to staying centered and recharging after extended interactions with others. Sometimes its as easy as curling up in your favorite chair with a book and warm mug, but what about the interactions that can follow you anywhere?
Physical isolation from others can keep them at bay, but social media is with you 24 hours a day (rhyme was unintentional, I swear!). Merges and energy transfer do not just happen based on those who are physically around you, but can follow you anywhere thanks to the invisible web. Whether you are actively online or not, there is a connection perpetually set between you and others when you participate on social apps. And herein lies the struggle: How do you stay in touch without the risk of losing yourself?
Stay Connected While Keeping Your Energy Safe
Go Off Grid
The easiest way to keep from being bombarded is obviously by not even having social media. BUT, I know how unrealistic that can be. When going completely off grid isn’t possible or wanted, there are still ways to keep from getting overwhelmed by your online presence.
Minimize platforms used, and choose to participate only on those that best match what you want. Interested in mainly staying in touch with certain relationships? Check out which social apps your family or friend group is on most, and see if that’s the right fit for you.
Turn Off Notifications
Keep your phone from being a beacon that is always ping-ing when someone has done something to, or around, your online profile. This can become a constant distraction that can keep you from being by yourself, and getting the alone time needed to stay healthy. It can also impact your base levels of happiness and increase your need for validation through the number of likes and followers you receive.
Hide Posts
We all have friends and family who we want to remain in contact with, but limit our overall interaction. Some Apps, like Facebook, enable you to hide posts from individuals who frequently post content that can be disturbing, negative, or draining to read. Hiding posts will limit the content you receive from individuals who hurt your space, but if necessary you can take it to the next level…
Unfriend & Block
Blocking or unfriending people does not have to be out of hate for them, or lack of wanting them in your life, but instead focusing on putting yourself first and making sure you have what you need in place. Self care is not selfish. Ask yourself, if you could hang out with them in person every day, would that benefit you? If your answer is no then ask yourself, why should you give them access to you online 24/7?
Limit Loitering
Social apps capitalize on user updates by the millisecond which provide ample content for others to browse and consume, keeping them preoccupied while the company makes money off of every click and view. Scrolling through your news feed or hashtag searches can be like falling down a rabbit hole. Try to avoid deep diving social media because it can overstimulate and overwhelm.
Time Block
Another great tool for managing your socials is approaching it like any other task or errand. When you’re ready to tackle it, choose a specific timeframe to focus on that and be sure to set a deadline for when you’ll set it aside. This way you can prepare yourself for online exposure in advance, respond to messages and posts accordingly, and have a lifeline to tug you back to yourself after a safe amount of time. Schedule time blocks for posting and checking social sites and stick to it.
Self care is not selfish.
Extend Boundaries as Needed
A bit more uncommon, but when needed you can view your online presence as more than just what is on social apps by extending to text messages and phone calls as well. If anything, text messages and phone calls can be more detrimental to mental wellbeing since it is a direct line to your phone.
You can put your phone on Do Not Disturb mode to silence any notification from coming through, screen your calls, or even wait for voicemails if you feel that’s needed. My family knows that if they need something immediately, they have to call me. I do not respond immediately to texts because it is too much for me to be readily available to a device that can ping upwards of 40+ times an hour if a group chain is particularly entertaining for everyone else involved. It’s alright to step away when needed. Let the people who message you know that you’re not available all the time and the ones who matter will understand.
What to Do When People Don’t Understand
When new boundaries are needed or old ones are threatened, communicate. If people are true and care for you, they will respect your decision, even if they don’t understand what you mean. There will be those though that think you’re being overdramatic, rude, or any number of other things. And you know what? That’s their decision to have, but at this point you have a choice whether their continued thoughts and opinions are weighing heavily on you. How others choose to see you is a reflection of themselves, not you. Respect their decision, but choose to let it go.
We live in a world where there are more possibilities than not, and options are abound. You may find that some tips listed here are only needed from time to time while you find your footing, and others are a permanent fixture that keep your life running smoothly. You can start small and decide on a macro level what you want and what you don’t want, and build out from there. Choose what works best for you and your social media wants, my friend, and live your life the way you are most fulfilled.